MUCH ADO ABOUT PERSEPHONE
In which Sade and Persephone finally begin dating, after five failed attempts.
December
One month after the main events of Where Sleeping Girls Lie
“What is it called when the girl you like, who you think likes you too, kisses you several weeks ago and then proceeds to never mention said kiss again, so you’re left wondering whether you dreamed the whole thing or if it actually happened?” Sade asked in one breath. She was sprawled out on the carpet of Seacole House’s very ugly common room, spiralling.
Basil blinked at her. “Uh… I’m sure they probably have some definition for it in the DSM-5?” he suggested, running a hand through his now rainbow-coloured mop of hair.
Baz’s suggestion was not helpful, so Sade continued to spiral.
“I imagined it, didn’t I?” she said, finally, after a few existential moments. “I do that a lot, you know? Imagine things… Things that aren’t really there.” She mumbled the last part. She really should have asked Persephone about the kiss when it had happened, but there had been more pressing matters Sade had been dealing with, such as her still pending expulsion among other things. Now too much time had passed for it not to be weird, and Sade was stuck with the echo chamber that was her mind.
“Maybe I imagined Persephone liking me too… God, I feel like such a knob.” Sade sighed as she picked up the floral-patterned cushion next to her and buried her face in it. She quietly screamed into the pillow, the material swallowing most of the noise.
Just then, the shrill pinging sound of Sade’s phone rang out thrice.
Basil picked up her phone, seeing as Sade was still indisposed and squinted at the messages in her notification centre.
“The Winter Ball is on Friday… I was wondering if you were free at 6? Persephone,” Basil read out loud. Sade lowered the cushion from her face, her eyes wide.
“Is that really what it says?” she asked.
Basil nodded slowly, showing her the evidence. Sade sat up so fast she almost gave herself whiplash.
She read the message. Basil had indeed been telling the truth.
“Oh my god,” she said, reading and re-reading the text as though it would somehow slip out of her phone and disappear into thin air. But as she stared, the message stayed put. “Persephone did kiss me,” she finally concluded.
Basil’s eyebrows furrowed. “How does this confirm the kiss?”
“She’s asking me to the Winter Ball, so obviously we kissed.”
“I see…and kissing means what exactly?”
“I don’t know…that we’re dating? Look, I haven’t done this much before, but I have watched a lot of movies, and when the person you like kisses you, it usually means they like you back and want to date you,” Sade said matter-of-factly. But then her confidence waned a little. “Right? What do you think?”
“Well…if every guy I kissed was going to be a potential suitor of mine, I would technically be dating my roommate Spencer and at least ten Hawking boys right now. Which I am not.” Baz’s answer was not helping; it only created more questions.
“Wait, you’ve kissed Spencer?”
Baz waved it off. “It was in second year. It was a different time and I was a different lad,” he said.
Sade wondered if this was the reason Spencer seemed to hate Basil so much, and if there was more to their lore that Baz was conveniently leaving out.
“Also, what about Kwame? Isn’t he a Hawking boy?” she said, accusingly.
“What about Kwame?” he muttered absentmindedly. He picked up a Rubik’s cube that had been sat next to him, busying himself in the colours and not looking at Sade.
“Well, last I heard from you, you guys were study buddies and had kissed once,” Sade said.
Baz ahhed and shook his head, spinning more columns on the rainbow block. “Kwame dumped me. He rudely told me that I was terrible at German and should consider letting him tutor me – which honestly, can you believe the guy? Thinks he knows everything. I told him I did not want or need his help in German, and then he had the gall to ask me if I knew anyone who could let him into the fourth-year café for a date! Turns out he had been allowing me to tutor and occasionally snog him so he could take some other person out using my connections!”
This was so much information for Sade to take in, all she could do was blink at her rainbow-haired friend.
“And what did you say to that?” Sade asked, even though she was ninety-nine percent certain that Kwame was referring to Baz as the person he wanted to take out. It was evident from Kwame’s very obvious feelings for Baz, but also by the fact that Baz had said that he and Kwame had apparently kissed multiple times (new information to her), which in Sade’s mind clearly meant they were dating.
She’d forgotten how clueless Baz could be. Perhaps he was not the best person to be asking for help from on Persephone, but it wasn’t like she had many other friends she could ask.
“I said, no way, Jose and walked out of the library with my pride intact,” Baz said with a nod.
“You really showed him,” Sade replied, hiding a smile.
“That I did, friend. That I did,” he said.
Sade made a mental note to check in with Kwame later and see how he was holding up, since he’d been accidentally dumped by Basil. She had grown quite fond of Kwame after he’d helped her hack the school’s mainframe a few weeks ago with no questions asked. The least she could do was make sure he wasn’t too heartbroken over this whole thing with Baz, and maybe also allude to the fact that he should definitely try again with his clueless crush – but perhaps in a more direct way.
For now though, a quick Google search told Sade that she was right to assume that the prom invite was to be seen as a sign of romantic intention. And so, Sade had her answer about whether the girl she liked, liked her back. She couldn’t be more relieved.
#
A few days later: The day of the Winter Ball
Sade had spent the entirety of Friday afternoon getting ready. After her final lessons, she’d rushed to her dorm room, and started the lengthy process of trying to choose the perfect outfit for what would be her first date with Persephone.
She had many options, none of which felt completely right, but she was aware that time was not on her side and so she finally settled on a navy-blue silk gown and a pair of strappy black heels. She’d chosen a dark-coloured dress in case her nervous sweating soaked through her outfit, and since she wasn’t sure what the other students would be wearing, she decided to go for something between formal and casual. Though she still kind of felt like a princess.
At exactly six on the dot, there came the sound of knocking.
Sade felt like a ball of nerves was coursing through her as she rushed to open the door.
As expected, there was her knight in shining armour — also known as Persephone Stuart. Persephone had a surprised expression on her face.
“You look…nice,” Persephone said, a smile gracing her lips as she gave Sade a once over. “A little overdressed I suppose, but still nice.”
Persephone was not dressed in ball attire, but instead in her usual out-of-school uniform of dark denim and a band shirt.
What on earth was going on here?
“Overdressed?” Sade questioned.
Persephone’s eyes widened. “Oh no, I don’t mean to sound like I’m judging or anything. Sorry, I just meant that seeing as we’re doing set up for the ball, you might want to change into comfier…shoes, that’s all,” she said.
Set up?
What was Persephone talking about?
Persephone must have noticed Sade’s confused expression, and quickly added, “Unless you’ve changed your mind about wanting to help the Events Committee? No pressure if you can’t help out any more. We are short-staffed but we’ll be fine! I can lea--”
“NO! No— I mean, I’d love to help, with, umm…setting up the ball,” Sade said, feeling silly now.
It seemed Persephone had not asked her out. She’d asked her to join the Events Committee for the evening.
“If you’re sure?” Persephone said, with an arched eyebrow.
“I’m sure, let me just, uh…change out of this dress. I was just trying it on — thought you were picking me up at 6.30, hence this whole debacle,” Sade lied, trying to toss a light-hearted laugh in there but deciding to scrap it when she sounded more like a choking hyena.
“Good plan. I can wait for you,” Persephone said, stepping into Sade’s room without permission and casually taking a seat on her desk chair.
Sade rummaged through her wardrobe for something more casual while keeping one eye on Persephone who seemed completely unaware of the alarms going off inside of Sade’s head.
The alarms were in part caused by the mortifying fact that she’d assumed this was a date in the first place, but also in part because no matter how many weeks had passed, no matter how many times Persephone or Baz visited her room, Sade still couldn’t shake the feeling of encroaching on Elizabeth’s space – even though Elizabeth had transferred out of Alfred Nobel Academy months ago and was now safe and sound in Ireland. It was a strange and unsettling feeling, one she hoped would leave her soon.
Sade got her wish not so long after, when another feeling overtook the guilt. A feeling akin to embarrassment which settled over her as she briefly locked eyes with an unassuming Persephone, who always seemed to be staring directly through her like an X-ray machine. She felt her face warm at the narrow possibility that Persephone could somehow hear her thoughts.
Persephone half smiled at her as if she could, but Sade did not return the smile. Instead she hurried along into the bathroom with her change of clothes, and locked herself inside.
As Sade relaxed against the closed door, it quickly dawned on her then that this was only a temporary solution. She couldn’t lock herself in all night.
She sighed.
It seemed the universe had not finished toying with her just yet.
January
Two months after the main events of Where Sleeping Girls Lie
It was the start of mock exams season, and Alfred Nobel Academy had officially gone into a total lockdown.
No student was allowed off school grounds, except in the case of a family emergency, and no one was allowed in.
According to Baz, mock exams were apparently a month-long event which happened every January, where the students were forced to study themselves to death then take fake exams that would provide them with their predicted grades and track their progress.
“No one takes it seriously, though. There aren’t actual consequences for failing mocks, just the intense feeling of shame,” Baz explained as they walked through the corridors of the science block on the way to the library.
“Sadly, there are actual consequences for me. If I fail it will be the final nail in the coffin – or the official end to my sentence here, if you’re looking at it in a glass-half-full sort of way…”
Baz squeezed her hand. “I will not let that happen, and I also doubt you will fail anyway. You’re like the smartest person I know…after Persephone…and Kwame,” he said, and then his head jerked up. “Speaking of the devil,” Baz mumbled. Sade followed his gaze to the edge of the corridor where Kwame was shoving the contents of his bag into his locker. Sade had spoken to Kwame a few weeks ago about Baz, and Kwame had pretty much told Sade that while he really liked Baz, he was not that convinced that Baz wanted to be with him and did not fancy forcing the boy to go out with him and so was leaving it all in Basil’s hands.
She couldn’t fault him there.
“Should we take a different exit to avoid walking past him?” Sade asked after several moments of watching Baz watch Kwame in silence.
Baz shook his head and then, without another word, hooked his arm through Sade’s and began walking right into the line of fire.
When they finally reached Kwame, Sade watched in bemusement as Basil tapped him on the shoulder. Kwame turned to look at them, his expression puzzled, but also showing what Sade knew to be the relatable signs of mock-exam-induced exhaustion.
“Hi, Kwame. Do you want to study with me tonight?” Baz asked, and, as if by magic, the exhaustion left Kwame’s face as he suddenly stood straight.
“Yes, I’d, umm, love to. 8 o’clock?” Kwame spluttered his response out.
Baz nodded. “8 works. My room?”
Kwame smiled. “Sure.”
And then without so much as a goodbye, Baz was off and dragging Sade along with him.
When they were out of the science block, and away from where Kwame could hear them, Sade finally forced Baz to stop.
“What on earth was that?” she asked.
“What was what?” Baz responded.
“The thing with Kwame, obviously! Last month you said you and Kwame were over?” she replied.
“Oh right, that…well, we started texting again over the winter break and I decided tonight will be a litmus test to see if we can work as more than friends.”
“How will studying for mocks together help determine that?”
“Oh, Sade, you really are clueless when it comes to ANA lore. Asking someone to study during mocks season is not actually asking them to study. It’s a code word for let’s DTR.”
“DTR?”
“Define the relationship,” Baz clarified as they continued walking down the path again. “So many iconic relationships have been born out of mocks season – like Francis and April.”
Sade wasn’t sure that Francis and April were an ideal to look up to given what had happened last term, what with Francis committing murder for April and April taking the fall for him. They didn’t seem much like goals to her, but she nodded anyway. There were so many rules at ANA and though Sade had been at the school for four months now, she still feared she’d never catch up.
“So asking someone to study during mocks is a subtle way of telling them you want to date them?”
Baz nodded. “More or less. If nothing happens with Kwame tonight, then I’ll have my answer and can finally move on to my destiny as an old man with pets as my only companions – which is honestly starting to sound more appealing to me than anything else...”
“Well, I wish you the best of luck with that,” Sade said laughing as they entered the Starry Night library.
They climbed the stairs to their usual floor – the quiet one – but when they got there, it was the busiest Sade had ever seen it. It seemed like hundreds of students were crammed into the room. Everyone wore identical panicked expressions that Sade assumed came with the high stress of mocks season.
“I didn’t realize the library would be so packed…” Sade said, eyes widening as more students spilled through the doors.
“It shouldn’t be; the students of ANA take school seriously, sure, but not this seriously… Plus I checked the library logs online. There must be something else—” Basil cut himself off as a herd of boys walked past them holding what appeared to be some kind of dessert. His head whipped around to the corner where most of the traffic was concentrated, and his eyes grew big. “Doughnuts,” he said, with no further context.
Though Sade had already figured out which doughnuts her friend was referring to.
In the corner was a huge sign that read “free mock doughnuts” with eager, sleep-deprived students crowding around it.
“This isn’t a study crowd – the world is starting to make some sense again!” Baz said, sounding the most delighted Sade had heard him all day.
“Are you going to get some?” she asked, amused by how easily sweets made her friend light up.
“Of course! Do you want one? I’m going to line up, and you can grab our table.”
Sade nodded. “Yes please, a custard doughnut is preferred but jam will do.”
“Got it,” Baz said as he ran towards the chaos, and was quickly swallowed by the crowd.
Sade made her way over to their usual table and was not surprised to see Persephone there, hunched over her textbooks in deep concentration.
They’d barely seen each other since the awkward not-date of the ball, because for once Persephone had decided to not stay in school during the winter break, instead opting to go skiing in Switzerland with her best friends, April and Juliette. There was also the fact that Persephone was taking mock exam season especially serious and rarely seemed to leave the library. The most Sade heard from Persephone these days was on the brown bitches group chat that Basil had created, where the blonde girl would mostly give them updates on all things NotSoNoble and react to Baz’s memes – largely by telling him to stop sending unfunny things to the group chat. Sade was almost certain that Persephone lived in the library at this point.
“Hi, Sephy,” Sade said as she pulled out the seat opposite her. Persephone gave no indication that she had heard Sade at all, so Sade reached over and lightly tapped her on the shoulder. This finally got her attention as the unholy girl startled, basically jumping out of her seat.
“Christ,” Persephone said, clutching her chest, staring at Sade wide-eyed.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” Sade replied with a smile as Persephone pulled out her earphones.
“You didn’t scare me, you almost gave me a heart attack,” Persephone said returning her smile. Sade loved Persephone’s smile, which made everything that was happening, or not happening, between them all the more difficult.
“How long have you been here?” Sade asked.
Persephone’s eyebrows furrowed together and she looked up as if searching for the answer. “I’m not sure…” she said, covering her mouth to yawn.
It was just like Persephone to take mock exams this seriously. Anyone would think she was the one who was on the brink of expulsion and not Sade.
“When was the last time you slept…”
“Monday, I think…”
“Sephy, it’s Thursday.”
“Oh,” Persephone said.
That explained the wild look in her eyes.
“I’m guessing I look like dog shit?” Persephone asked.
Even without sleeping for several days straight, Persephone couldn’t look further from dog shit. Persephone always looked perfect, just like the rest of the Unholy Trinity. Never a hair out of place.
“You look, umm, good…great,” Sade said, trying not to make it sound too much like she was eager to compliment Persephone.
After the embarrassment last month with the whole Winter Ball mix up, Sade was seriously considering putting all ideas of her and Persephone as anything more than friends to bed. Especially seeing as nothing had happened between them since and potentially would never happen again, even though she really wanted it to.
It would be so much easier if Persephone would just read her mind and let her know already if they were dating or not.
Or, alternatively, it would be easiest for Sade to just ask…
She thought about what Baz had said about the ANA rules around Defining the relationship.
So she took a deep, courageous breath.
“Persephone,” Sade said.
“Hmm?” she replied, chin resting on her palm as she looked up from her textbook to Sade.
Here goes nothing.
“I was, uh…wondering, if you weren’t busy or tired or whatever, if you wanted to, umm, study later today or tomorrow or any time this week really? Together…alone, I mean.” Sade couldn’t have been less inelegant with her question, but she supposed it was better than saying nothing at all.
Persephone quirked an eyebrow up and looked at Sade intently, her pen in her mouth as she silently stared.
“I’ve already promised Maribel I’d study with her,” Persephone finally answered.
Sade felt her heart sink into her stomach. Maribel was Persephone’s chatty roommate. She hadn’t realized that the pair could be more than roommates, but it made sense. They spent so much time together, of course a romance could develop from that. Maribel was simply faster than Sade at DTR-ing.
Maribel must be why Persephone had not initiated anything post-kiss.
“Right,” she said, trying to sound upbeat and totally not on the verge of quitting school, changing her name, and moving to some remote island in the Red Sea.
“Here we are! One custard doughnut for you,” Baz’s perpetually jolly voice came from behind. “Oh hi, Persephone!”
Sade was grateful for Baz’s interruption. She turned away from the blonde girl quickly, smiled up at Baz, and accepted her treat with a thank you.
“Hello, Basil,” Sade heard Persephone reply in the same tone of voice she only ever reserved for Baz and Baz alone – endearment mixed with an edge of annoyance.
“Elizabeth wanted to see what the mock exam doughnuts look like this year – says it’s one of the few things she misses about this place – so I’m going to send her a selfie of us with them,” Baz said as he took a seat next to Sade and snapped a picture before she even had the chance to process. “Sent!” he continued with a giant smile, unaware of the unfortunate situation he had walked into.
Maybe it was better this way: Sade finally having her answer instead of waiting for what she now knew would be an inevitably doomed situation.
Later that evening, Sade gate-crashed Kwame and Baz’s study session to inform them all about her failed foray into romance.
She felt bad for disrupting Baz’s DTR session with her own issues, but she knew that if she spent any longer in the quiet confines of her room she would be driven mad. So Baz let her crash.
The five of them –if you included Baz’s stolen guinea pig Muffin who was seated in his lap – and also Elizabeth who was present via video chat, ended up staying up far too late (curfew was more lax during mock exam season) watching one of Baz’s favourite Brazilian novellas, Roque Santiero. This, weirdly, was one of the things that ended up helping Baz and Kwame define their relationship, as Brazilian novella night quickly became a weekly tradition between the two boys.
#
After several gruelling weeks of revision and exams, Sade was finally done.
It seemed mock exams were aptly named, seeing as every practice test she did was indeed mocking her with its difficulty.
While mock exam season did not produce a relationship between Sade and Persephone, there were three positives that did come out of it:
Sade passed her exams, meaning she was not expelled from Alfred Nobel Academy. This was helped in part by a (weirdly) glowing report about Sade’s behaviour, written by the resident matron Miss Blackburn.
Basil and Kwame began dating, though they were not yet exclusive or official (something Sade still did not understand the logistics of).
Sade decided that she was done with her humiliation ritual of trying to get the girl she liked to date her; she was now going to focus solely on school.
At least there had been doughnuts.
February
Three months after the main events of Where Sleeping Girls Lie
Alfred Nobel Academy sure did love its holidays.
Valentine’s Day, a day Sade had previously spent alone (for the obvious reason that she was home-schooled and had no proximity to any viable suitors), was apparently a very big deal in the halls of ANA.
And today the hallways were decked in all sorts of Valentine’s décor. From heart-shaped bunting to cupid figurines everywhere, to red and pink adorning every square inch of the school’s interior.
Sade had learned all about the ANA Valentine’s Day tradition of secret messages baked into cupcakes and these cupcakes getting delivered throughout the day from secret admirers.
This year, however, would be the first year in ANA’s history where that tradition would not be honoured.
Due to everything that had taken place with the Fishermen, and the ongoing remedial action happening in the school as a result, the academy did not want to encourage any harmful or inappropriate romantic behaviour. Thus, aside from decorating the halls in the colours of love and romance, all the other ANA traditions that surrounded Valentine’s Day had been officially cancelled.
This had, of course, caused an uproar. There were considerable grumblings that the entire student body was being punished for the actions of one group of terrible boys.
“It’s the way things have to be until the school board is confident that student safety is being put first,” Miss Blackburn had announced to the angry mob of students who had shown up demanding a change in the rules put in place for the day.
And as expected, Miss Blackburn would not budge. It seemed it was out of her hands anyway.
This was why Sade was very surprised when she’d arrived back to her room after classes had ended that day and found a vanilla cupcake sitting outside of her dorm room.
The cupcake had pink icing that was drooping down the sides and clumps of sugar and butter poking out of it, as well as light-pink heart-shaped sprinkles. It was clearly homemade.
As she picked it up, she tried not to think of the dead rats (plural) that had been placed on the very spot this cupcake had been placed on. Sceptical about eating it, partly because of the rat thing, but also because she had no idea who’d sent the baked good, Sade instead tried to pull the cupcake apart without getting icing on herself.
As suspected, a small scroll with a message was wrapped inside.
Sade felt her heartbeat increase as she stepped into her room and placed the decimated cupcake on her desk before unravelling the note.
‘Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?’ Sonnet 18
Meet me in Curie House in my dorm room at 8 p.m. (don’t bring leaf boy) – P x
Sade’s heart stuttered in her chest as she read and reread and reread again the message from Persephone.
Her thoughts were a mixture of confusion and excitement.
On one hand, she and Persephone were just friends now… Yes, there was a tension-filled homoerotic undertone to almost every interaction they had, but they were friends nonetheless. On the other hand, Sade wasn’t sure there was any way to interpret this message as anything but romantic. Persephone was finally asking her out.
Sade: I think Persephone just asked me out for valentine’s day
Basil: ??? When? Where? How?
Sade: she sent me a cupcake with a message asking me to meet her tonight
Basil: !!!!!!!!!!!!
Sade: I know!!! Hopefully this won’t be a repeat of the winter ball…
Sade: oh god, what if it is a repeat of the winter ball and I’m being delusional
Basil: It definitely sounds like she’s asking you out, to me
Sade: O___O
Sade: In that case… I have no idea what I’m going to wear
Basil: Wear your school uniform, Persephone seems like the type to like the studious sort
Sade: you want me to wear my school uniform… on a date…
Basil: Yes, why not?
Sade: ….
Basil: Muffin just told me that wearing your school uniform would be a fine choice indeed
Sade: …I’ll consider it
Sade wouldn’t be considering it at all.
It seemed Google would have to be her best bet for fashion advice.
#
Google was somehow even less helpful than Baz.
Apparently having all the world’s resources and advice at your disposal was not always a good thing. It just made this more complicated and overwhelming.
In the end, Sade decided on the very safe option of a plain black T-shirt and jeans. There was nothing suggestive about this at all, if it did indeed turn out that Persephone had not meant to ask Sade out in a romantic way.
At 7.54 p.m. she made her way out of Turing House, anxious nerves making her hands vibrate and tingle as she walked to Curie House.
It was 7.59 p.m. when she walked into Curie, and 8 p.m. on the dot when she finally knocked on Persephone’s door.
Sade heard shuffling, a crash and then a string of hushed profanities. A minute later, she heard the click of the door unlocking before a very…odd-looking Persephone appeared in front her.
Odd because Persephone was very dressed up, and not in her usual colours. She was wearing what appeared to be a chiffon red dress with spiky red boots. Her blonde hair was braided back into short cornrows with pink and red butterfly clips in them, and her make-up was an array of gorgeous pinks and reds reminding Sade of Persephone’s Queen of Hearts Halloween make-up.
Sade suddenly felt very underdressed.
“You look…really nice,” Sade said.
“So do you, as always,” Persephone replied with a smile and Sade’s cheeks grew warm.
For the next few moments, they had an unintentional staring match, but eventually Persephone seemed to remember where they were and snapped out of it, losing their game. She moved back sharply from the entrance, beckoning Sade in.
Sade crossed the threshold and closed the door behind her.
“You can sit anywhere — just need to arrange some things first,” Persephone said. Strangely, she looked…nervous. Her eyebrows were drawn together as she scrambled around her room.
Sade took a seat on one of the bean bags in Persephone’s side of the room, which looked different from when Sade had last seen it.
For one, it was much darker than before as the only light came from the candles dotted around. Her band posters were partially obscured by the heart-shaped bunting that hung around the room – very similar to the bunting in the school’s hallways. And then there was the television, which hadn’t been there the last time Sade was here, and which had a bunch of romantic movies loaded up on the screen.
If Sade hadn’t been sure whether this was a date before, the candles, décor and movies were a very positive indication.
There was also Maribel. Or the lack of Maribel.
“Where’s Maribel?” Sade asked as she watched Persephone shove things into drawers.
She looked back at Sade then. “Oh, umm, I asked to have the room for the evening. I think she’s with her girlfriend in Franklin House.”
Sade raised an eyebrow. Maybe Maribel and Persephone studying together during mocks last month was just that… Studying.
“Maribel has a girlfriend?” she questioned, wanting extra clarification.
“Yeah, Suzy Chen from the volleyball team. They’ve been together for forever,” Persephone said. She finally seemed to be done with whatever it was she had been doing. She turned back to Sade with a shy smile – a rarity from Persephone.
Sade returned her smile, feeling the gentle thrum of her heart as Persephone dragged the other bean bag close to Sade, and sat down.
This was followed by another impromptu staring contest. Sade lost this round.
“So…” Persephone said. “Wanna watch a movie?”
Sade nodded. “What are the options?”
Persephone reached over to grab the remote and began flicking through the array of romantic comedies and dramas. They landed on The Princess Bride.
“Have you watched this before?” Persephone asked as she hit play and pulled a blanket from her bed over the two of them. Sade was aware of how much closer they were now.
“Love this film,” Sade said, trying not to focus on the proximity of Persephone’s arm to hers. “I used to watch it all the time with my…my sister. We’d re-enact the fight scenes.”
Sade felt a twinge in her chest at the thought of her sister. She pushed it down. Thinking about Jamila too much would conjure a projection of her from Sade’s conscience, and Sade didn’t really want to feel guilt or any negative emotion right now. She’d felt so much already.
“There are…fight scenes?” Persephone asked, looking puzzled. “I thought this was meant to be a romance movie?”
Sade brushed her memories away, letting them slip under the surface. “Yes. The film is multi-layered, complex, full of twists and turns…but also very romantic,” Sade replied.
Persephone looked sceptical but nodded anyway.
A comfortable silence settled over the room for several minutes as they watched Buttercup and Westley’s love story unfold. Sade felt Persephone move even closer.
“I got us pizza. It should be coming soon. I remembered your order from last time,” she whispered. “Pineapple and pepper and extra cheese, right?”
Sade nodded. “Yeah,” she whispered back. “I’m impressed by your memory.”
“Well… It’s not that hard to remember such an unhinged order.”
Sade looked at Persephone now, feigning offence. “Hey, my order is great.”
“I’ve tried it, and it’s definitely not. But I won’t judge you for it.”
“Says the girl who likes mushrooms on her pizza!”
Persephone raised an eyebrow. “What’s wrong with mushrooms? They are nature’s candy.”
Now Sade was shocked for real. “I can’t believe you just said that. Never repeat that again, especially not in front of Basil — he might collapse.”
The idea of it made Persephone laugh out loud. Sade loved the sound of Persephone’s laugh; it was weirdly high-pitched and melodious and so disarming. She loved Persephone’s smile the most, though. It felt like the rarest of treasures, something she only showed those she was comfortable with. Sade loved that Persephone was comfortable around her. Sade loved…liked a lot of things about Persephone.
When Sade had first seen Persephone in the cafeteria on her first day at Alfred Nobel four months ago, they’d had what would be the first of many staring contests. Sade thought, and still thought, Persephone was the most striking person she’d ever seen.
She didn’t notice herself moving closer to Persephone until she was right in front of her face. It felt inevitable.
Persephone smiled and moved in too, tilting her head down.
Sade closed her eyes, the nervous excitement returning and rattling through her veins.
And then suddenly, a loud persistent knocking rattled through the door.
Persephone sighed and Sade felt her warm breath against her face. Then Persephone’s arms moved away from where they had been resting against Sade’s under the cover.
Sade’s eyes flew open to Persephone getting up to open the door for the intruder.
Of course, just as they were surely about to kiss, the universe would interfere yet again with Sade’s happiness. Thanks, Universe, Sade thought, looking up at the ceiling in annoyance.
“Jules? What happened…” Persephone’s tone was concerned.
“I don’t want to be a bother, but April is off with Francis and I was alone--” It sounded like Juliette had been crying.
“Do you want to come in?”
Sade looked up as Juliette entered. Her running mascara and smudged eyeshadow confirmed that she had been crying.
“Hi, Juliette,” she said with a semi-forced smile. She liked Juliette but didn’t know her that well, plus she always had a lingering guilt about the time she’d accidentally drugged her, so as a result, their interactions were always brief.
Juliette looked at Sade with wide eyes and then back at Persephone. “Hi, Sade… Sephy, am I interrupting something?”
Persephone shook her head. “No no, not at all! We’re just watching a movie – The Princess Bride, it’s uh…pretty good so far,” Persephone said.
“Sephy, I can seriously leave if I’m--”
“No, you’re staying. We will have a great Galentine’s Day with the three of us. Three is better than two, I always say,” Persephone replied.
Galentine’s? Sade thought
Jules looked at her, sceptically. “Alright…well I’m going to clean up the mess that’s my face,” Juliette said, and then disappeared into the bathroom in the corner of the bedroom.
Once Juliette was out of earshot, Persephone looked at Sade apologetically. “Jules is going through a lot of things right now… I don’t want her to be alone.”
Sade was still processing the fact that Persephone had referred to their hang out as Galentine’s, and the fact that their almost-kiss might not have been that at all. But she was almost certain it was… It had to be…?
These mixed signals were giving her a headache.
She momentarily pushed her thoughts aside. “Did something happen recently?” Sade asked.
Persephone glanced cautiously over at the bathroom door. “It’s just everything with you know who. It’s sort of imploding this week,” she said and Sade instantly knew without her having to elaborate further.
You know who could only be one person in this context.
Mr Michaelides, Sade’s former English teacher from last term.
Her same English teacher who had also been quietly fired last term for inappropriate behaviour. It had happened so fast and so quietly that most of the student body didn’t have time to really question or speculate about it. He was quickly replaced with another teacher and things at the boarding school moved merrily along, almost as if he had never been there to begin with.
But he had been there, and the school could not hide the scars he’d left behind in his wake.
Sade had found out the truth about his firing just before the winter break. That Mr Michaelides had had an inappropriate, year-long relationship with Juliette that had ended abruptly only after Michaelides was fired, leaving Juliette heartbroken and severely unaware of how troubling all of this was. Persephone – and Sade by extension – had been there to support her through it.
“By imploding this week, you mean--” Sade began.
“Jules’ parents are getting lawyers involved, which was the last thing Jules wanted, but I don’t know… I think it’s a good thing,” Persephone whispered.
Sade nodded, whispering back, “I do too.”
“I just hate that bad things keep happening – and are allowed to keep happening. It feels like when one monster is found, a bigger, nastier one awakens in its shadow, and I…I don’t know if any of them, Jude, the Fishermen, Mr Michaelides, will even properly pay in the end,” Persephone sighed, looking like she was holding her anger back. Then she shook her head as if to fend off the bad thoughts, and flashed a quick smile at Sade as if to reassure her that all was well.
This was a fruitless action, seeing as Sade was the queen of pessimism and bad thoughts, and had already thought all of this, and worse, countless times over the past few months. But there was no place for dragging everyone into her own sea of despair right now.
“I hope she’ll be okay,” she said instead.
“I hope she’ll be okay too,” Persephone said, then gathered some pillows from her bed and placed them next to the bean bags.
Juliette returned a few moments later looking better.
“Okay! I am ready. Galentine’s Day is a go!” Juliette said as she took a seat next to Persephone and got under the blanket with them.
Persephone pressed play, and the three of them continued the movie in a comfortable silence. Juliette had her head buried in Persephone’s shoulder, and Sade was hugging one of the cushions now.
Eventually, the pizzas arrived and Persephone offered to split hers with Juliette.
“No offense, Sephy, but mushrooms are disgusting,” Juliette said.
Sade smiled at Persephone triumphantly. “Exactly.”
“And pineapple on pizza is a crime against humanity,” Juliette continued. “You are both equally messed up people.” She decided that eating nothing at all was much better than indulging in the disgusting pizza contest they were apparently having against each other.
Persephone seemed to find this hilarious, and laughed in the way that made Sade glow inside.
At some point during the final quarter of the movie, Juliette fell asleep, but Sade was too engrossed in the movie to notice. It wasn’t until she felt a gentle weight on her hand that she was pulled away from the screen.
Under the covers, Persephone’s hand slid gently onto her own.
Sade’s heart stopped for moment, a fluttering sensation spreading through her chest. Persephone closed her fingers over Sade’s and squeezed.
March
Four months after the main events of Where Sleeping Girls Lie
It was March 14th and Sade was in the lunch hall with Basil eating pies — as one did on Pi Day.
This was Sade’s first Pi Day at Alfred Nobel, and she was once again struck by the odd traditions of the school.
The lunch menu was nothing but pie: from savoury chicken pot pies to sweet blueberry. Sade wasn’t that big a fan of pie, but Basil informed her that it was blasphemy to not indulge in one on Pi Day. So under the weight of coercion and social pressures, she caved.
“Is Kwame joining us today?” Sade asked as she took a stab at her red lentil pie.
Baz shook his head. “He’s got a rowing race.”
Sade gasped. “He’s missing the sacred day of Pi? I didn’t know that was allowed.”
Basil, who was not the best at spotting sarcasm, nodded in agreement. “I know, totally lawless. That’s why I quit the team,” he said.
“You quit rowing because it is a lawless sport?” she asked.
“No, I quit because staying on the team would mean missing Pi Day, and I would never.”
Just then Baz’s phone buzzed, and he smiled down at the screen. “Elizabeth just sent me a picture of her pie. I think it’s lemon meringue,” he said.
Elizabeth was being home-schooled while taking care of her mum, but Sade knew that Elizabeth’s experience of home-schooling was a world away from her own. Most of Sade’s Elizabeth updates came from Basil, who was never not texting her. Sade rarely spoke with Elizabeth alone, but when she did, she always seemed lighter, happier now that she was away from the school.
“Tell Elizabeth I’d trade her lemon meringue for mine any day,” Sade mumbled as she looked down at the unappetizing heap on her plate.
“Will do!” Baz said as he tapped out a message, or most likely several messages, to his best friend.
Too caught up at frowning at her plate, Sade didn’t sense someone approaching until there was a dark shadow hovering over the table.
Sade looked up and found Persephone staring down at her.
She quickly sat up, as though she had been electrocuted — which was kind of what Persephone’s stare felt like.
“Hello, Mars,” Persephone said. This was a nickname Persephone sometimes called Sade. She’d coined it as a result of Sade’s apparent constant day-dreaming, but she’d not used it that much recently. It made Sade strangely happy to hear her using it again. It was a good sign, she thought.
Persephone glanced at Basil who was still hunched over texting. “Hello Basil,” she added. Baz looked up then and waved.
Persephone’s gaze fixed back onto Sade. “I brought you pie,” Persephone said, holding out a single miniature pie towards Sade.
Sade tried not to let the delight show too much on her face. “Which flavour?”
“Raspberry.”
Sade wasn’t too fond of sweet pies, but she accepted it anyway because it came from Persephone – and it was most likely better than the lentil pie she was eating.
Since Valentine’s Day (or Galentine’s, Sade still wasn’t sure) Persephone had been asking to hang out a lot more – though nothing much would happen. Sometimes they’d just spend hours talking, sometimes they’d study together. The most they ever did in the romantic sense was hold hands while walking through the school’s quad. Sade wasn’t sure if holding hands meant they were anything serious, but what she did know was that Persephone Stuart was the most confusing human being ever.
“Thanks,” Sade said. She would cherish this pie for ever — or at least for as long as she could before Baz inevitably ate it.
As if on cue he said, “I love raspberry pie,” while staring at the pie in Sade’s palm longingly.
“I would have brought you one if I’d known you’d be here. I can run back to the student council offices and get you a few? Student council is doing a fundraiser for Pi Day, so I’ve been handing out raspberry pies and spreading the gospel about period poverty.”
Sade raised an eyebrow. “Period poverty?”
“Yes. It impacts people with uteruses all around the world. We’re raising awareness and funds to provide safe and hygienic menstrual products to those who need it. It’s a really important cause.”
Sade knew what period poverty was; she’d just thought the pie was a bold romantic gesture.
Her point proven yet again about Persephone being confusing.
Sade nodded. “Yeah, it sounds really important.”
“Happy to make a donation,” Baz said. Sade nodded, pulling out some cash from her purse, which Persephone accepted.
“Thank you both! Basil, I’ll run off and get you your own raspberry pie.” And then Persephone was off.
Sade put her head on the lunch table, and began gently banging it on the wooden surface.
“You’re going to give yourself a concussion,” Baz said.
“Good. Maybe then I can erase ever wanting to date Persephone Stuart in the first place.”
There was silence before Baz asked, “Did you think she bought the pie just for you?”
“Yes,” Sade mumbled.
“That sucks, I’m sorry.”
Sade was sorry too, for ever believing in something as nonsensical as love.
There was more silence as Baz tapped on his phone and then he spoke again.
“Elizabeth says you need to stop being a terrible communicator.”
Sade, whose head was still face down on the table, turned to look at her rainbow-haired friend.
“What?” she said.
“I told her about you and Persephone’s strange game of will they, won’t they and she says, and I quote, tell Sade that she is being pathetic. She needs to tell the girl that she likes her, otherwise nothing will ever come of it.”
Sade considered Elizabeth’s words. She hated the idea of talking about her feelings at all. It was much too dangerous.
“Elizabeth wants me to communicate effectively…in this economy? I’ll pass,” Sade said.
“What’s so wrong with just asking her?” Baz asked as Sade finally raised her head back up.
“Everything. She might not like me back like that and it will ruin our friendship.” Sade sighed as she unfurled the casing of the pie and stuffed the small pie in her mouth. “Trust me, I’ve seen, like, one thousand movies like this. It doesn’t end well,” she said, her words muffled by the sweet pastry.
“Sade, the real world isn’t like the movies. Sometimes a girl just likes another girl and the other girl likes the girl back and everything works out,” Baz replied.
Sade blinked at him as she swallowed the last of the pie. “I have no idea what you’re saying right now.”
“Elizabeth just texted: Go and ask Persephone out now – exclamation mark. I agree with her. You should.”
“I’ll consider it.”
Sade did consider it. But she realized she was content with holding hands and hanging out with Persephone. It was a safe, predictable state of being where things didn’t have to change and she could have Persephone by her side and not worry that this would end.
She did not have to go through the humiliating ordeal of admitting her feelings for someone.
This was fine.
April
Five months after the main events of Where Sleeping Girls Lie
This was not fine.
It was the furthest from fine, actually. For some reason, Persephone Stuart was ignoring Sade and had been for the past week.
It was the Easter holiday break and most of the student body had left, leaving the grounds hollow as they always were during school breaks.
Basil had decided to spend the break in Ireland with Elizabeth. He’d offered Sade a room in his family’s guest house if she wanted to go with him, but she decided not to crash the party. Baz hadn’t seen Elizabeth in five months. It was best that they got uninterrupted time together.
Almost everyone Sade knew was away. Almost.
Persephone had stayed behind, like always, preferring school to being trapped at home under the scrutiny of her parents.
Sade was hoping that they would spend some time together during the two-week break, but so far Persephone had been avoiding her and Sade had no idea why.
It didn’t help that she could see Persephone now. Right in her line of vision, seated on a desk on the other side of the library, working on a joint project with a guy from one of her classes.
Persephone had nodded in acknowledgement when Sade had arrived earlier but that was about it. No hi, no smile, no nothing.
Sade: [relationship status: very very complicated]
Basil: Persephone still ignoring you?
Sade: yes
Basil: I shall send an elite array of memes to help lift your spirits
Sade had come to the library to get some studying done. Her final exams were in just over a month and she was, as always, behind. It wasn’t wise of her to be getting all worked up over a girl anyway. She should focus on school and on not getting herself almost kicked out again.
Sade’s phone buzzed again with another text from Basil, followed by another and then another. It was, of course, the memes he’d promised. Sade was convinced that he kept a folder of them on his phone for moments like this.
Sade: these memes have not helped me get over the fact that Persephone is ignoring me and I’ll never have a girlfriend
Sade: But thanks for effort
Sade was about to put her phone down when a flurry of texts came through once again.
Basil: oh god
Basil: I’m sorry
Basil: I accidentally sent the memes to the brown bitches group chat…
Basil: and you replied… to the memes… on said group chat
Sade’s eyes widened as she looked up to where Persephone, previously focused on her project partner, was now twisted around, looking straight at her.
Sade wanted to die.
Persephone looked back down at her phone and began typing.
A moment later, Sade’s phone buzzed in her hands.
Persephone: Is there something you wanted to say to me?
Sade wanted the ground to open up and swallow her. Why did bad things always happen to her?
She opened up her private text with Baz.
Sade: If you never hear from me again, I have decided to erase myself from history
Sade put her phone on the table and considered her options realistically.
She could go back to pretending to revise and ignore both Persephone’s loud presence in the library and her message, or she could pack up all her things, lock herself in her dorm room, and stay locked in there for good.
Or…
Sade glanced up at Persephone who was still staring at her. The unholy girl’s eyebrows were raised and she had a small smile playing on her lips, like something about this was hilarious.
“I can’t live like this,” Sade muttered quietly to herself before standing up and marching right over to Persephone.
“Sephy,” Sade said, her heart hammering in her chest as she tried to look and sound serious.
Persephone looked up at her. “Sade,” she said.
“Can I talk to you in private, by the stairwell?” Sade asked.
Persephone nodded and told her project partner that she’d be back soon before following Sade.
As soon as they were both by the stairwell and the doors had closed, Sade spoke.
“What are we?” she said. A simple direct question that would hopefully get a simple direct answer.
Persephone looked taken aback. “Sorry?”
“Five months ago, in November, you came into my dorm room and kissed me.”
Persephone nodded matter-of-factly. “I did.”
Sade took a deep breath.
“What is the deal then? Because I like you and I thought you liked me but then you’ve been sending all of these weird mixed signals, and I kept thinking I must have imagined us kissing but then you asked me to the Winter Ball, and I thought okay I did not imagine that because you only invite the person you like to balls and events, or so I thought, but no, it wasn’t an invite to be your date, you wanted me to help set up. Then in January I asked you to study for mocks and you said you were studying with Maribel, and everyone at ANA knows studying together during mocks is code for hooking up, and so I honestly thought that was your answer, but then comes February! Valentine’s Day, or Galentine’s, as you referred to it several times. Who asks a girl out for Valentine’s Day after snogging her, only for it to not be romantic at all? And then there was Pi Day, and don’t get me started on the past week—”
Sade was cut off rather dramatically by Persephone, whose lips pressed against hers.
At first Sade was startled, unsure of what was going on, but when she realized, she relaxed and kissed Persephone back. The two stood interlocked for a good few minutes, until Persephone finally came up for air.
Sade felt warm all over as Persephone grinned – something that used to be rare for her to do, but seemed to be getting more frequent the more time they spent together.
“Does that answer your question?” Persephone asked.
“Not really. I wasn’t finished talking,” Sade replied.
“Sorry, continue. What were you reprimanding me for again?” Sephy’s smile only grew wider.
“Being confusing and weird for the past five months, and also not asking me out already.”
Persephone laughed then, like really really laughed. Like this was the funniest thing she had ever heard.
“Why are you laughing?” Sade said, her eyes narrowing.
“I thought we already were dating this entire time.”
Sade was so confused.
“But the Winter Ball…”
“I would never actually go to a school ball. It is an antiquated patriarchal tradition, but sadly I had to help set up because I’m on the Events Committee – it looks good on university applications – but I did want to hang out with you, hence the invite.”
“What about Mocks and Valentine’s Day?” Sade asked.
Persephone took both of Sade’s hands in hers now. “Well, something you should know about me already is that I don’t play about with exams. I usually study with Maribel because she’s as neurotic as I am when it comes to revising. Having you looking so cute next to me would just be distracting…and Valentine’s Day was genuinely meant to be a date. But you know Juliette is going through a lot and I didn’t want her to think she ruined my date, so I just pretended that it was not a date.”
Sade felt a little bit like a knob now. She couldn’t fully meet Persephone’s eyes.
“Pi Day? And the whole ignoring me thing this week…” Sade asked weakly, knowing that her entire argument had essentially been destroyed in a matter of a few seconds.
“I wasn’t actually meant to be on delivery duty, since I’m deputy head girl. The prefects were the ones doing the deliveries. I delivered yours specifically because I wanted to see you… And as for the last week, I thought you were ignoring me first actually,” Persephone said.
“Me ignoring you?” Sade looked at her again, brows furrowed.
“Yes. I got a sense that you were annoyed with me or something — which I now understand — and April suggested I take a step back, let you cool off…play hard to get,” Persephone looked a little embarrassed. “That’s the last time I ever take dating advice from the girl dating Francis Webber.” Persephone shivered at the mention of his name.
There was silence, and in that silence Sade and Persephone started up their staring contest yet again. After a few moments, Sade burst out laughing and Persephone followed suit.
“We are not very smart,” Sade said.
“Yeah, we aren’t. But it’s not a deal breaker for me, if it isn’t for you?” Persephone asked.
Sade shook her head. “It’s not a deal breaker for me at all.”
“Can I just say, you’re really cute when you ramble,” Sephy said, brushing some of Sade’s braids out of her face.
“And you’re a sadist. You seem to enjoy my torture.”
“Only a little,” the blonde replied with a mischievous glint in her eye.
“So we’re dating,” Sade said.
“Yes, if you still like me that is.”
“Of course I do, even though we are terrible communicators.”
“We’ll work on it,” Persephone answered with a shrug. “Important thing though, is that I like you a lot, Sade Hussein, and I don’t mind telling you that every day so that you know.”
Sade felt her insides warm. “I like you too, Persephone Stuart. Even though we’ve only kissed once.”
“Twice, actually if you count a moment ago…but, honestly, I didn’t want to rush you.” Persephone leaned in close. “We can make it three times if you’re free later on?”
Sade liked the sound of that. “I’m free.”
“I’ve got to go finish up this project. I’ll see you,” Persephone said, and then kissed Sade a third time before disappearing through the double doors.
Sade had spent the better part of the last five months wishing that the girl of her dreams might like her back. But it appeared she always had.